I've passed the 4th, 5th, 6th, and 7th. There will be the 13th and there will be August 19th, but it was last weekend that I felt looming and that I both dreaded and welcomed. I made it through, with a lot of help from my friends, family, and Ky's friends. I spent time with several, got calls and emails and notes from others. They were thinking of and praying for me and Mir and Gear. Every message was an embrace. They (you) got me through.
I had a gift in the night. I dreamt of Kyle when he was about 3 years old, about the age he is in this picture, taken on their first day of school after we moved to Eagle Rock. Miranda heading off to Eagle Rock Elementary and Kyle to Eagle Rock Montessori. Except in my dream his hair was shorter.
I don't remember much, but the dream went on for a long time. At one point Kyle was holding my mascara and someone (I think it was MY mum) was concerned, but I went over to him and let him hold it with me as I put some on my eyelashes. Was I ever so gentle and caring as I was in this dream? I only hope so.
I never put a lot of value on dreams, but now they are treasures. I got to see Ky again, so sweet and earnest. My beautiful little boy.
2 comments:
I love hearing about Kyle visiting in your dreams - and Nana too!
How precious are these two babies of yours! I confess that they remind me of Kiersty and Nick. So many, many happy memories you have, I know.
I was just listening to an old lecture that Leo Busaglia did (remember him as the "hug" or "love" Dr.???) after I rediscovered his book, Living, Loving, & Learning on my shelf and which I first read in 1978.
He was discussing death and dying in his Italian culture and the memories associated with loved ones vs. the things associated with loved ones. It was such a powerful teaching and gave me great hope. He stressed our loved ones existence within us, after death. It was marvelous.
You can find the lecture on YouTube in 10 parts, it takes patience to watch, but was probably one of his last. The title was "Born For Love". You would like it. I know Kyle would have liked it, too.. : )
Love and Leo Hugs,
Robin
how beautiful. i love that he visits you there as well as other places. thank you for sharing..and reminding me to be more patient and gentle. i love you. k
and the picture--darling
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