There is joy . . .

After an email from my dear friend Suzanne, I realized that mostly I am blogging about Grief. And while that is very cathartic for me (after all, Grief is everpresent in my life), it is hard on you, dear reader. And it also gives you a false impression of Life After Death. Because Grief and Joy are not incompatible and right from the beginning I was capable of laughing and even being downright silly. One's sense of humor doesn't die with your loved one. And I am sure it would be comforting for you to know that.

Because I am finishing up Taxes (appointment at 2pm), I can't wax away here, but I do want to share with you the joyful thing that happened this morning. See that pool up there? See that duck? Well, as I was heading for my swim, this cute Quacker and his mate had beat me to it. I've seen them for two springs now, early morning, swimming around in the condos' 85 degree pool. I was curious to see what would happen, so I got in. Mr. & Mrs. Mallard got right out. I felt bad, but then again, I wasn't sure that swimming with ducks was like swimming with dolphins. They stood together at the end of the pool, not a foot away from the edge, keeping their eye on me as I did my 15 laps.

Then, I got out. Sat still for a few minutes, and the two were back in again. As I started messing with my cell phone to capture this pic, the Missus got a little nervous and jumped out. The Mister continued to swim as if to say to her, "Come on back in, Mama, the water's fine." She didn't and I took off.

So. A little story. To bring a smile. And to let you know that I smile a great deal, laugh a great deal, and am joyful a great deal.

But, to the taxes.

Yes, taxes, again -- and more reminders

I think any of you who are following this blog must wonder at all my references to taxes. Why so many? Well, I filed Federal and State taxes late last year, in October. Then, in February, I was busy doing my City Taxes. Now, I am determined to do my Feds on time. I'm not doing too badly. Should be better prepared for my appointment on Friday than I normally am.

The challenge? Reminders of Kyle are everywhere. They are in the envelope of receipts--all the purchases for the Last Thanksgiving, the Last Christmas, the Last Concert in town, the Last Year's Birthday party before the Last Concert, the Last Birthday Dinner. Why did I save them? Cause I just collect all my pieces of paper from my wallet, purse, calendar book, briefcase bag, desktop, and throw them in a file and then greet them all again at tax time. My theory: the more receipts, the more deductions I'll find.

But what do I find along with those little deductions? Kyle-related receipts that have nothing to do with my taxes. But can I throw them out now? Of course not. How can I throw out the receipt that tells me what we had to eat in honor of Ky's turning 22? How can I throw out a random receipt with spaghetti carbonara on it--it had to be Kyle's order. How can I throw out a receipt for boxers--the annual Xmas re-stocking of his underwear. Or the receipt from Pearl for all his art supplies.

So I stuffed those receipts in an envelope and wrote "Kyle" on it. And I took other receipts and put them in an envelope with "Miranda" on it.

And I got back to my taxes.